I've just spent the best part of a day and a half in bed with a nasty bout of flu, so I won't write a long post tonight, just long enough to wish everyone A HAPPY NEW YEAR.
"Good morning, Photographic department, can I help you?"
"Ah yes, er, I bought a digital camera from you a couple of months ago and now I want to buy a home printer from Argos, but they want to know what type of card it takes. The camera's a good one, a Nikon."
"Have you taken the media card out and had a look."
"Er, I didn't know you could. How do you do that?"
"There's a little compartment at the bottom, were your batteries go in, next to that should be the card, press it and it should come out."
"Hold on, yes, I've managed that. What next?"
"What does it say on the card?"
"Er, Fuji."
"Anything else?"
"Yes, 32 megabytes."
"No sir, does it say SD or XD?"
"Oh yes, SD, is that important?"
"Certainly, you'll need a printer which will fit an SD card, but you'll probably find most of todays printers will have slots for all types of card, SD included."
"So I'll be alright to buy this printer from Argos then?"
"If you want to sir." (Just so long as you don't come here I thought.)
Some folk have got the right idea when it comes to shopping. Just sit in their nice cosy houses, pick up the phone and ring their local store.
"Can you tell me how much it costs and have you got plenty in?"
They don't give a thought to the poor person who has struggled, getting into work, in the icy blasts and pouring rain just so as they can answer the phone. If I've got myself in why can't they? Why can't they play the game properly or have I got it wrong and their way is the true game?
I don't mind really. If the shoe was on the other foot, I'd probably do the same.
Suffice to say, the mad bargain hunters were out en masse today and for once everbody was quite pleasant. Christmas wrapping paper was on half price and we sold out! I bought so much this year, I had plenty left over, but I'll still have to buy some in 12 months time because I won't be able to find it!
Full day tomorrow, back in the store all day and then out on the Provvi job in the evening, then same again Thursday.
Oh well, I knew it would come to an end. When you work in a shop, the holidays don't last long.
Last Thursday when I knocked of work, I thought, Yippee, 4 days off. It seemed such a long break, but as I'm sat here writing this, I'm thinking, "that went fast."
I know people who work in industry around here who don't have to be back until the 4th Jan. Lucky beggers. I must be in the wrong job! At least I've got the weekend off, not that I ever do New Year revelling. On New Years eve the wife has usually fallen asleep on the sofa by 10pm leaving me to watch Jules Holland's Hootenanay on my own. At midnight I walk outside then walk back in again with a lump of coal, and wish myself a Happy New Year. Daft innit.
Oh, I do hope we don't get any awkward customers tomorrow. I really aren't in the mood to be polite to them.
Thanks to DaFFy from Sydney, for reading my scribbles and blogrolling me. Welcome.
I shall have to go and mentally prepare myself for tomorrows ordeal.
I had a bit of a sore head this morning. I blame the Diet Coke that was drunk, late last night. I thought I'd have a coke to wash all the wine and beer down.
Anyway, everything's back to normal today, kids toys are still working which is a miracle, enjoyed the turkey sandwiches for lunch. Curried turkey tomorrow, and the day after, and the day after that, etc.
I'm so bushed I think I'll have an early night.
Thanks to Jody from Iowa for linking to me. All the best Jody.
Well, it's Christmas Day, around about 9pm my time, and I'm the last man standing!
Check my log:
6.30- Wife gets up to toilet, followed closely by me.(No sign of kids awakening.)
6.45- Wife brings coffee up to bedroom,(Comments " They're not up yet then?")
7.00-Fred says to Wife,"Bugger this, it's too quiet out there, I'm getting up, kids or no kids,"( Macho!)
7.15-Cup of coffee in hand, Fred says,"Shall I waken them, Santa's been."
7.20-All Hell lets loose.
7.30-Ditto.
7.45-Wife says,"Come on, clear this mess up." ( Fred retires to kitchen to cook bacon butties.)
8.00-Bacon butties consumed, wife says to Freddy," Have you got the batteries for the littie ones toy dog?"
8.0.1-Fred says,"Of course, in the drawer, got them weeks ago,"( Yesterday!)
9.00-Turkey goes into oven.
9.05-Turkey comes out of oven.( Forgot to take plastic wrapped giblets out, Doh.)
9.25-Switch on brand new present, DAB Radio. (Planet Rock...Rock on!)
10.00-Chuck all cardboard and plastic into recycle bin, dig up parsnips and sprouts from garden,(Smug bastard aren't I?)
11.00-Chuck more cardboard in bin, prepare starters,( Prawn Cocktail, if you want to know.)
11.15- Bit of air guitar to Planet Rock. Sip first beer.
11.30- Start second beer, eye up bottle of Claret, mix Yorkshire puds.( Pancake batter for non Brits.)
11.45. Crack bottle of claret, Roast taties in oven, Air guitar to Planet Rock.( My fave group T' Who..Won't Get Fooled Again.)
12.45-Turkey out of oven, gravy ready, tats ready, stuffing ready, sprouts ready, remote control dog ready, table set... go for it!
1.15-Well stuffed, pud to consume yet, having a breather, phew!
1.45-Kids dont like Xmas pud, demand Ice-cream.
2.00- TOTP on telly, a brief moment to reflect on today, and the astonishing fact that it actually snowed today. A White Christmas.!!!!
2.45- Chuck kids out in snow.(Peace on Earth, goodwill to all parents.)
3.00-Queens speech, (Couldn't understand a bit of it, except, "My Husband and I,")
3.15- Fred ain't washing up, "I've just spent 3 hours cooking your dinner and doing a very passable air guitar rendition of Joe Walsh's -Rocky Mountain Way."
3.16- Fred starts washing up.
3.20- Daughter takes pity on me offers to help.
3.21- Fred retires to living room and considers wether to watch, "Singing in the rain," or "Whie Christmas." Decides on "White Christmas." ( Purely for the military interest, and the fact that I can mess about with my new Windows XP media version computer.)
Talking about my new compu.....( sorry!)
4.00- Kids lost half the bits to their new toys, Wife wants to know what to do with left over Turkey, Bing Crosby has lost his girl, sorry, got her back again, my mistake, lad crushed a Malteser into carpet, by accident, Wife Hoovering. Bing and gang singing "White Christmas."
4.30-All calm- Eastenders on, ( Sings "Silent Night." not well received.)
5.00- Falls over kids toy- (" It's alright son, I'll fix it tomorrow.")
6.00- Play Bingo, with Wife and a 5 and 7yr old. (Parents will understand.)
7.00-Wife says, " I'm a bit bushed, can you sort the kids out, I fancy a nap."
7.30- "Harry Potter or no, your'e still going to bed."
8.00-" No, No, No, get back to bed." (Now I know why I had to wake them this morning.)
Sitting here in front of my PC, a glass of wine in my hand,(not cheap muck an'all), I thought that I would raise it to my lips and wish everyone who has read my blog, past, present and future....
Sorry I have'nt posted in a while, but what with working all hours on my Provvi job and my normal day job, allied to the fact I've got a new computer which has taken me a while to set up.
The computer is my pride and joy. It works like a dream. Instead of 64mb of RAM, I've suddenly got 512mb's to play around with. My DVD's aren't jerky anymore.
Will get back to normal posting soon.Still lots of stuff to set up.
A pedestrianised street in a gritty northern town on a grey morning the Saturday before Christmas. Festive lights twinkling in the shop windows. A busker in a dis-used shop entrance playing a violin. Crowds of happy shoppers wearing Santa hats, some of them in football shirts hurrying to get their shopping done so they can get down to the big local derby down at the stadium. The two mounted Policemen on their magnificently groomed horses. "Clip, Clop, Clip, Clop." the sound of their shod hooves echoing down the street.
On their way to the ground I thought.
The policemen must have been in a festive mood as well, because their horses left a few presents behind, but the happy shoppers weren't having any of them. In fact the presents were being avoided like the plague except for Mr black BMW who drove down with 4-way flashers going to illegally park outside Index. He managed to park his front tyre right on top of the biggest present, then step on top of another one when he got out of his car. Serve him right, I thought, I bet he's one of those people who don't clean up after his dog. Mr BMW didn't look too happy, as he lifted first one foot then the other. He looked across at me. I just shrugged my shoulders. He looked around, as if expecting someone to help him. The busker carried on playing his violin. The happy shoppers walked past staring. I finished my break and went back into the store, thinking.......
We've been working very hard in the store these last couple of months and made some really good sales. The management team have been telling us how brilliant we are and how we are 10% above targets. We were looking on the notice board at the memo that detailed how much Christmas bonus we would get and licking our lips. 10% above target was 10% of our 6 monthly salary. It was true. We rubbed our eyes again. It was true, it says so on the notice board. 10% above target = 10% of our 6 monthly salary. We were all going to get some big bucks for Christmas. Yippee!
Then the buggers moved the goalposts.
Because of the refit that we had done in the summer, we were told, the company added an extra £500,000 to our targets, around about 18% extra, so we have failed to meet the target and our bonus will be 1% of our 6 monthly salary. This comes to about £30 after tax. Management had known about this for months and neglected to tell us. So there we were these last few months working our socks of for bugger all. To say that the workforce is angry would be an understatement. So if you've got some last minute presents to buy, don't come into my store, the well known high street chemists, that has it's head office in Nottingham and was founded by a Jesse, but at the moment has an ex Asda man in charge, because.....
The road outside our store turns into a pedestrian precinct between the hours of 10am-4.30pm. No vehicle is allowed down there between these hours except emergency ones, and the people who drive to the front entrance of Index with their hazard lights on. ( Putting hazard lights on when parking illegally does not, contrary to popular opinion, fool the traffic warden.)
I was outside the store in my breaktime getting a bit of fresh air, when I noticed this white transit van bearing down on two women who were stood in the middle of the road chatting away like most women do. The van was doing the incredible speed of at least 2mph, so by my reckoning it would take about 5mins to knock these two down. Ample time to move out of the way.
The van was almost upon them when one women pulled her friend away to the side. The other women glared at the driver and in a loud voice said, "If you 'ad knocked me down, I'd 'av sued yer, yer f*****g b*****d."
And that got me thinking about the way everybody blames someone else for the mishaps they have today and how, at the slightest whiff of any financial reward, they'll go running to the "No win, No fee," parasites that are springing up all over the place. People are throwing themselves on the pavement, then sueing the council, over uneven paving slabs. I think personally, that it's getting out of hand, especially when council taxes and insurance premiums start rising to cover the cost of these claims.
Now then, let's see what's under this monitor cover..........( bangs and flashes.)
(Looks at damaged hand and wonders if he can sue the computer people.)
We were supposed to go to Bagshaw Museum at Wilton Park today for the Christmas event and carol singing procession, but it being a dull day, weather wise, and still feeling a bit tired after yesterday's trip, we decided to give it a miss and stay at home.
Instead, we put the Christmas decorations up.
After we'd finished, I think I'd have rather have braved the weather.
How can a set of fairy lights that you had coiled neatly, and stored safely in the loft, turn into a jumbled up knotty mess a year later? Is there a fairy light demon living in my loft? And how come the glass baubles you wrapped in cotton wool last year end up broken? I mean, I can't recall going up into the loft since last Christmas. I try not too because the spiders up there are pretty big.
Ahh! I know. The spiders must have had a floodlit game of tennis up there.
The folk of Grassington in the Yorkshire Dales, dressed up as characters from Charles Dickens novels today, in order to add a bit of atmosphere to the annual Christmas Fayre.
The main street and market square was decked out with fairy lights and loads of stalls selling anything from mulled wine up to wallet busting festive candles.
And it was packed.
It seemed that half the middle-aged ladies of Newcastle had descended on the place. The coaches kept rolling in and dropping off their passengers and then having to park up outside the town because there wasn't enough room in the carpark for them all.
For entertainment, there were Morris Dancers, fire-eaters, jugglers and an open air Carol concert accompanied by a brass band. Every 50 yards or so, young kids would be singing carols or a flautist, or a trio with guitar and tambourine, all collecting for charity. The highlight later on was a candlelit procession, following Mary and Joseph who were riding a donkey. One enterprising Tiny Tim lookalike was even doing shoe-shines for a quid.
After waiting ages for my site to be reviewed by The Weblog Review, they finally went and did it. Feel free to have a look at it by following the link.
I originally submitted the site for review because I really didn't know how other people would like my posts. But I've come on a bit since then, and write because I enjoy it, and if anyone else likes reading about it, well, that's a bonus.
Speuter, the person who wrote the review, said some nice things about my blog, ( I can't get through the door, my heads suddenly got a bit too big.)
A bit of advice that was given, would be to spruce up my layout. Now I would like to do this but to be honest, I really don't know where to start.
The whole family went to the supermarket tonight in order to get the non-perishable essentials for Christmas, like booze, choccy biscuits, booze, frozen gateux, booze, mixed nuts, oh, did I mention some wine.
We had a budget of £100, so I took my calculator along with us to add it up as I went along. The kids wanted to take theirs as well. We must have looked a right sight, walking around with 3 calculators. The lad had a right pad on because I kept forgetting to tell him the prices. When we got to the checkout, I'd arrived at the figure of £104.98, the lad had £97.23 and the little girl had £4265.47. Well, she is only 5 years old! We were all wrong anyway, because the bill came to £108.72.
The kids wanted to look at this house we'd spotted the other day, which was well lit up with decorations, but Dad forgot and drove home the opposite way. They were grumbling like mad all the way home but were completely gobsmacked when they saw Santa on his sleigh in our street. The sleigh was being pulled by a Land Rover and Santa was sat at the back dishing out sweets for the kids. It was organized by the local branch of the Lions club and their members were knocking on doors for donations to charity.
" There you are," I said. " If we'd gone to look at those lights you'd have missed Santa."
It also woudl'nt have cost me a donation in the charity box.
If you follow this link and go to Desmonds Blog and read his post "My Best Friend was Ill", you won't be disappointed. Leave him a comment and he will be a happy man.
Sunday number 2 on my run up to Christmas, saw us at Cannon Hall nr Barnsley attending their Christmas craft fair. The staff were dressed up in Victorian costumes which added to the atmosphere. In the Ballroom was a fellow telling stories about what life was like, back in the 1800's. It was a bit depressing so we didn't hang about long, instead we joined a rather long queue to see Santa in his grotto. My two were really excited, especially the little girl. We didn't have to wait too long before we got in and I must say that Santa was very good. Sometimes you get some naff Santas, but this guy was a professional. He was so good, perhaps he was the real one. Noaw, he couldn't have been, could he? Mind you, when I asked him what the weather was like at the North Pole, he told me it was cold and snowing. Only the real Santa would know that. Wouldn't he?
After Santa, we had a look around the craft fair, which wasn't all that good so thankfully my wallet stayed put in my pocket. Phew! A nice cream tea in the Victorian Kitchens followed, leaving just enough time to sing a few carols with the Salvation Army Band. On the way back to the car, we passed the garden centre and the wife popped in and came out with a rose, so my wallet wasn't saved after all!
There's a heavy weekend coming up next week, so any donations will be gratefully accepted!
Working in a shop, we get our fair share of nutty customers pass through the doors and today we had a couple of wierdo's.
The first one went up to the fragrance counter waving a bottle of perfume.
"Can you gift wrap this for me?" she asked the assistant.
"Certainly madam." said the girl as she swiped the barcode on the box.
"What are you doing, I've already bought it."
"Oh, did you buy it here, because I can't remember serving you."
"Don't be stupid girl, they're too expensive here, I bought it at Superdrug, I just want it gift wrapping, it is a free service isn't it."
After explaining that we will only gift wrap items bought on our premises, the customer wandered off complaining loudly and threatening to write to the manager, head office and trading standards.
Nutter!
The second nutter we had concerned the Passport photo booth. We wondered why there was a queue building up so someone went to investigate, and he found a woman, sat inside just finishing off a yoghurt.
"Excuse me, are you having your photo done because there is a bit of a queue." asked the sales assistant.
"Oh no, I was just eating my lunch and this was the only seat I could find in the store." replied nut number 2.
"There's no seats because this is a chemists, not a cafe." retorted the lad.
Now on a school day we are all on to drag the little blighters out of bed, but, surprise, surprise, the little girl was up at 6.45am closely followed by the lad. The number 1 was duly opened with much excitement and the small chocolate treat consumed. Then they both slumped in front of CBeebies and complained that they were tired! After a full day at school, they both went to sleep tonight earlier than normal. I wonder if they'll both be up so early tomorrow.
If you notice in my sidebar, below the doodleboard, I have got a guestmap from Bravenet. Feel free to stick a pin in so I can see which part of the world you're from. Ta!
Have you put your Christmas decorations up yet?
We haven't, but the kids are putting pressure on us to get them up. The wife says that if they go up to early, she'll only have to dust them for longer. Myself, I like it when everything looks festive, but I'm staying out of it. Anything for a quiet life.
Married with two children. A boy age 14 and a girl age 12. I have 4 goldfish,a black and white cat just like Postman Pat, a 7yr old Ford Focus 'C' Max and a mortgage.
The White Rose Of Yorkshire
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